Surviving Malicious Intent -- Listen

For Surviving Malicious Intent, perhaps leaving the scene is the best course. On the other hand, many and various factors might require staying. The LISTEN involves keeping a toolbox of your own nearby (and well-practiced with the good and safe listener).

For Surviving Malicious Intent, LISTEN by always letting him or her talk first, and in general saying less, while keeping steady nonverbals. Be attentive, not encouraging. Smile because you're a smiler, not in reaction to anything currently being said or done.

For Surviving Malicious Intent, LISTEN by answering questions with silence or ambiguity. Never bait, challenge, argue, or show disrespect. For sure, never speak negatively to anyone in the system of which you both are part. Perhaps something will change.

If you're the leader and the person with malicious intent is a newcomer or a subordinate, it's never too soon to start teaching the entire community the LISTENing way of being with people. Patient teaching and modeling will pay off in group wisdom at your back.

We have studied the STOP, LOOK, and LISTEN methods for Thriving in Diversity, Overturning Persistent Ignorance, Managing Conflict, Reducing Generalized Anxiety, Stopping Verbal Abuse, and Surviving Malicious Intent. Now review and LIVE!

Some of the ideas in this article came from: Haugk, Kenneth C. Antagonists in the Church: How to Identify and Deal with Destructive Conflict. Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg, 1988.

Copyright 2014 Wilma Zalabak