Exercises a Couch Potato Can Do

You can exercise for your own good, even if you can only move an eyeball! That's right, I will teach you.

Let's focus on muscles. It's muscles that move your blood with oxygen and nutrition to your cells and with waste away from the cells. It's muscles that move your lymph with lubrication and protection to all parts of your body. So let's get some muscles.

If we focus on muscle building, we will lose weight without the diet fads, we will lose flab and wrinkles, we will gain many benefits despite aging. Today we focus on the muscles you can work to gain while sitting down. These are simplest, yet the most often overlooked, I think.

Several principles first: 1) In order to gain muscle you must hold any squeeze at least ten seconds; yes, count to ten; thirty is better! 2) Slow movement against resistance builds more muscle than quick movement, and is less traumatic to your tissues. 3) The burn or after-soreness of muscle exertion is alright; that's how you know you made some progress. 4) Don't continue any of these suggestions in the development of sharp pain, chronic pain, dizziness, gag reflex, nausea, diarrhea, or constipation; at least back off the intensity until you build more muscles over time.

So we're ready. Are you sitting down? We will start with the sitter! The pubococcygeus muscle is the floor of your torso and controls immense amounts of energy. This is the "pee and pooh" muscle, the one that can stop a flow of urine. Now that you know which muscle, tighten it. That's right tighten the floor of your torso and every hole in it. To hold it tight for ten seconds, you'll have to check on it every few seconds. This muscle likes to slip back into flacidity without any notice. So check, is it still tight? With this exercise you can delay incontinence, enhance orgasm, and give yourself a shot of warmth and energy in just about any circumstances. No one need know why you just now started glowing, or how you get enough energy to get up out of bed in the morning!

Next, the abs. Yes, you have abs, abdominal muscles, even if you can't see them. And I'm going to ask you to tighten them. Remember how it was as a teenager and you pulled in your tummy. Well, even if it won't pull all the way in like it did then, you still have tummy muscles that need to get active. So at least imagine for me pulling in your tummy. Don't extra breathe or stop breathing. Just tighten the muscles that wall in your organs from the front, and count to ten, or thirty. It's when the front muscles get weak that the back goes out. Furthermore, your digestive organs will work much more happily because of the hug and support they get from you in this way.

What about all those organs, and especially the diaphragm? That's the huge muscle that makes the floor of the second story of your torso and the ceiling of the first story. You need a strong diaphragm to protect you from hiatal hernia and other organ troubles. Here's the exercise for these: a big BELLY LAUGH! Can you laugh for ten seconds? Thirty seconds? For this exercise, I will admit it helps to have company so you can laugh at each other laughing! Your organs will thank you.

And now the chest organs, the heart and the lungs. I agree that the body needs aerobic exercise, in which constant motion accelerates the action of these organs for twenty minutes or more. However, there is a little taught exercise that can aid the lungs in cleaning their corners and the heart and blood vessels in transport and delivery. This is the time you can stop breathing. That's right, at the end of your exhalation, just wait to bring in another breath. Don't tighten the throat or blow out the cheeks. Just wait. Count to ten or thirty or whatever. Take a breath when you want it rather than just because you're used to grabbing another breath as soon as you're done with the last one. You can do this often, if you add to it ten minutes of taking deeper breaths. This easily done exercise reduces stress, deconstricts blood vessels, cleans up stale air in the corners of the lungs, and thereby increases nutrients, oxygen, and cell maintenance to the brain and extremities. You will feel more alert yet more relaxed.

Sure, you can roll your head around on your shoulders, roll your shoulders in the sockets, and other things you already know. Just be careful to do it slow, very slow, making resistance all the way. That way your muscles will grow.

I will show you some other exercises that call for less major movement, but produce huge benefits. Just remember our principles: 1) Hold the squeeze for ten seconds or more. 2) Move very slowly with resistance. 3) Welcome the "burn" in the muscle that tells you of progress. 4) Listen to your body and use common sense not to overdo in any exercise.

Exercise your face! You can do it. Keep those wrinkles, jowls, and double chins away. To do this you will need your tongue and that's a good thing. Your tongue is a very complex muscle. The tongue is ALL muscle. Think how much you have to work with in exercising the tongue! You will never get bored. You will gain better diction and perhaps be able to learn a new language or lose a persistent accent. Since your tongue is connected with the vocal cords, your voice might even sound better with tongue exercises. Furthermore, muscles inside the cheeks are connected to the gums so save yourself from gum laxity that invites disease.

You're searching for resistance in your face muscles, so run your tongue slowly and systematically around the inside of your mouth. Notice any muscle strand you can find. That's where you will start. Push your tongue against that cheek muscle and push the cheek muscle against the tongue. Make as much resistance as you can and hold it for ten seconds, or thirty. Find another cheek muscle; find the matching one on the other side. Find muscle strands in odd places, down low, up high, in the line of your lips. Build what you can find and after awhile you will find more. Press the tongue against the gums, and against the floor, top, and back of the mouth and hold it for ten seconds or thirty. Give your tongue the full workout.

Next the eyes. Lengthened-arm reading and dry eyes are only some of the reasons to exercise your eyes. Your eyeballs are attached to the inside of your skull and to the outside under your scalp. Those four large muscles for each eyeball can pack a whallop of energy, so let's learn how to tighten and hold here, too. Increase blood circulation and cleansing in the cranium and brain. The cornea itself is a muscle; keep it flexible. Face and eye muscle connections close to the ears may also enhance the function of the tiny muscles and bones of the ears for better hearing.

First smile with your eyes. Smile the smile you give children or someone you really, really like. This tightens the conjunctiva to let the cornea stand out a bit and catch the light, hence the sparkle in the eyes. Hold this all day. You can smile at the world or at yourself if you're alone. If you're with someone you love, this is good physiological reason for the energy you feel. Then without turning the head, look as far as you can to one side and then to the other, then up, then down, etc. The aim is not just to look in that direction but to put tension in the muscles that keep you looking there. Hold the tension in each direction for ten seconds or thirty. The consider your eyelids. You need those eyelids to stay closed while you sleep, but aging relaxes them and lets air dry out the eyes at night. So find a way to press the lids together, not like squinting but very smoothly, and hold for ten seconds or thirty.

With any of the face, tongue, or eye exercises, you may notice nasal passages clearing up or dropping their fluid to be swallowed. That is normal and to be welcomed to help flush out viruses and bacteria that otherwise might colonize there.

Perhaps you already do arm curls or shin kicks from your sofa. If you can figure out a way to create and use resistance, the benefit will multiply. Ankle or wrist weights might work, or just a can of vegetables in each hand. For wrists and ankles, do the range of motion roll very slowly and with great muscle squeeze. Leg and ankle work is important for balance and walking.

Fingers and toes are often forgotten in exercises, yet they are so wonderfully full of energy-producing potential that you could keep occupied for quite some time with them. Don't neglect the final joint on each finger and toe. If you baby those joints or let them get frozen in one position, that loss may stretch to poor balance, metatarsal foot pain, cold or swollen extremities, and the inability to play the piano! Use the principles we laid out to get back the motion and function in your fingers and toes. 1) Hold in a squeeze for ten seconds or more. 2) Use slow motion and resistance. 3) Welcome the burn. 4) Listen to your body.

Just a few extras here: For hair loss in women, it's likely a parasite in the follicles, so anoint your scalp with tea tree oil once a day. For less respiratory illness and better breathing use a nasal flush twice a day, a little saline solution poured in each nostril. For less germs migrating from teeth to stomach, use a mouthwash upon first waking, with tea tree oil if possible. First attack for more energy: drink water; not tea, coffee, or soda; before, after, and during exercise; whenever hungry, tired, or irritated.

You have now finished an amazing energy-producing workout, and you never had to leave your seat! You will notice some differences within minutes. Other benefits will come in a few days. Over months of consistent exercise, even the bones reshape themselves according to the squeeze and pull of the muscles attached to them.

These all arise from my own experience, so I know you can make a difference, from the sofa!